Then, picking my way across this tightrope of life/work/art, I tipped too far the other way. This week, all the guilt that piled up about leaving my family for a week sent me spiraling into a no-art-making mode, exacerbated by a grumpy kid and over-worked partner. I've struggled to make new words and sat at the computer in a sad, empty huddle. In the middle of it all, it's all excitement or misery, but looking back on the last three weeks, I can see myself like a newly trained acrobat, wobbling along the tightrope, overbalancing here and there, thrown off by events that just don't fit in my routine.
Today, I feel good. I've had a pretty normal day. It reminds me that I am a creature of habit, working most effectively when I'm working within the bounds of a pretty set schedule. I don't know what that implies for my future, but it does make me glad that I've limited my convention attendance to one big con and Orycon every year (at least for now). It's tempting to throw myself into outings and classes to try to become a better writer, but when it comes down to actually making words, the best thing seems to be a quiet kitchen table at the same time every day.
Now, if you're struggling in your own balance, here's a little tune to pick you up. It's from a new artist I'm finding as exciting as Lady Gaga (gosh, my dream show would be the two of them together!), and is a smart young lady tapping in to some awesome SF inspiration! Without further ado, here's Janelle Monae, rocking out "Tightrope":
3 comments:
Love your blog chick, always feels like you're sat right here chatting directly to us. I can actually hear your voice as I read! And glad you're back into your routine and the words are coming out. I'm liking the music vid too - definitely my kind of tune/vid i.e. a bit weird! We're seeing Lady Gaga next month and can't wait - weird but wonderful! The best things in life are.
I think quite a few of us can relate to this post! It was a struggle to return to "real life," and most frustratingly, despite knowing that the best cure was to buckle down and get some writing done, it was tough going for a while finding my focus again.
I have that problem all the time. First I tip one way, then another. And sometimes I fall off altogether. :)
Good luck this week!
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