Friday, October 29, 2004


Things are really starting to take off on our Halloween preparations. Today I carved a jack'o'lantern (Fi calls them 'junka's; it is beyond cute), and last night made her a pair of fairy wings. The monkey costume has flopped to due lack of sewing interest--I still have to sew Jak's cloak together. Uggh. Hmmn, would hot glue work? =)

Wednesday, October 27, 2004


Well, the Monster finally left the house. He and I had a little showdown over my disciplinary techniques after he whacked Fiona with one of her toys. I blew up at him; she was already acting really scared around him, and she was really tired and wound up. I can see why he got upset with her (she threw a toy at his head), but come on! Who's the adult? [Actually, my dad mostly acts like a big infant.]

When we were kids, Dad always exploded when we did something bad. He never separated the behavior from the person--just yelled and screamed and flailed. And I remember always feeling on edge around him. Never trusting just what he'd do or what I would do to set him off. And I've never felt truly comfortable around him--or any other man, for that matter. They are untrustworthy. They are scary.

What I know is that I don't want Fiona to grow up with those feelings. I am glad there are men in her life who are not my father.

Friday, October 22, 2004


Kurt and Juju's wedding was amazing. She looked so beautiful! He looked so handsome! They both spoke beautifully and filled our hearts with hope for the beauty of love.

Needless to say, I've been a complete sucker for romance the last few days. I've been emailing the old Chump, who might come for a visit, and of course started daydreaming about reconciliation possibilities. I know there's no chance, but once you get in a romantic groove, there's not much you can do to shake it off.


You know, I don't even know I'd want the Chump and I to reconcile. I like being a single parent. I like knowing that I can date anybody I want to, and not worry a second about commitment. Not that I'm dating anybody nowadays. But I could.

On the other hand ... I miss him. I miss the things we used to laugh at, adn I miss how comfortable it was to be with him and how sweet he could be, and probably more than anything else, I miss his cooking. He's the best cook I've ever met.

Damn Kurt and Juju!

Thursday, October 21, 2004


Wow! I'm back from the big wedding adventure!

Stay tuned for updates ... the baby is screaming.


Wow! I'm back from the big wedding adventure!

Stay tuned for updates ... the baby is screaming.

Sunday, October 03, 2004


Jesus, I tried on some older pants of mine that were in the rag bag, with the unhappy hope that they would fit. They're cute pants, and I want to have some more pants to wear on this trip, but they were discarded because they were ... too big. And now ... they fit. I was a size eight when I got here (mom's house), and now I'm a 12/14.

That's bad. Really bad. I've got to do something!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Everybody out there, please send me willpower and a dislike for sweets. Thanks.

Saturday, October 02, 2004

Brown v Jackson

I had an outstanding realization last night. The two guys on extended basic cable that I spend my drooling time drooling over are ... gasp! ... freakishly similar. I'll do the breakdown to fully explain to continuum of beauty that makes up Alton Brown and Daniel Jackson (as portrayed by Michael Shanks, not the equally h-h-hunky James Spader).

Alton's Physical Cuteness Quotient: blue eyes, glasses, blondish hair, perfectly kissable lower lip.
Daniel Jackson's Cuteness Quotient: blue eyes, glasses, blondish hair, perfectly kissable lower lip, plus rippling biceps.

Alton's Brainiac CQ: Incredible knowledge of food and science.
DJ's Brainiac CQ: Incredible knowledge of history and ancient languages.

Alton's Personality CQ: Ferocious wit and delightful patter, plus silly props.
DJ's Personality CQ: Bumbling manner veils insightful wit, plus fights evil aliens.

Alton's Negative points: Receding hairline.
DJ's Negative points: Nagging suspicion the actor who plays him is a poopy-face.

Wow! They're twins, separated at birth!

Now I just need an atom smasher to combine them and create THE PERFECT MAN. Or mincemeat, one of the two.